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GABRIEL CAME TO THE LORD AND SAID, "LORD I HAVE TO
TALK TO YOU, I HAVE PROBLEM. I KNOW THAT WE HAVE AFFIRMATIVE ACTION AND
WE ARE SUPPOSED TO HAVE 20,000 BAHAMIANS IN HEAVEN, BUT THEY ARE
CAUSING SO MANY PROBLEMS! THEY HAVE TORN DOWN THE PEARLY GATES SWINGING
ON THEM; THEY HAVE STOLEN MY HORN, THEY HAVE GOTTEN BARBEQUE SAUCE ALL
OVER THEIR WHITE ROBES CHICKEN BONES, SPARE RIB BONES AND PIG FEET BONES
ARE ALL OVER THE STREETS OF GOLD. SOME ARE WALKING AROUND WITH ONE WING,
CALLING IT FASHION- THEY MUST HAVE TWO WINGS TO FLY. THOSE ROBES ARE ETERNAL
AND MUST BE WASHED FIVE TIMES A DAY- SOME HAVEN'T WASHED THEIRS SINCE THEY
ARRIVED! THE MALES ARE LOOKING UP UNDER THE FEMALE ROBES AND MANY
WHO CAME HERE FROM TOO MUCH SALT IN THE DIET ARE STILL USING IT. SOME HAVE
REFUSED TO TAKE THEIR TURN IN HELPING TO KEEP THE STAIRWAY CLEAN.TAMBRINE
AND GUINNEP SEEDS ARE ALL OVER THE CLOUDS; SOME REFUSED TO WEAR THEIR HALOS
SAYING THAT FIT RIGHT OVER THEIR WEAVES OR CURLS.
" THE LORD SAID, "IT IS NOT FAIR NOT TO LET THE
BAHAMIANS INTO HEAVEN. THEY HAVE JUST AS MUCH RIGHTS TO BE HERE AS THE
HAITIANS AND THE CUBANS. MAYBE WE JUST DON'T KNOW HOW TO DEAL WITH THEM.
MAYBE WE ARE USING
THE WRONG APPROACH. WE NEED TO CHECK WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LITTLE
MORE EXPERIENCE DEALING WITH THEM. LETS CALL THE DEVIL."
THE DEVIL ANSWERED THE PHONE AND SAID, "HELLOOO...
LORD..... WHAT CAN I DO FOR YOU." THE LORD SAID, " WE HAVE A PROBLEM UP
HERE, AND WE'D
LIKE TO TALK TO YOU ABOUT IT. THE DEVIL SAID, "HOLD ON A MINUTE, I'VE
GOT TO PUT YOU ON HOLD!" THE DEVIL WAS GONE FOR FIVE MINUTES. HE CAME BACK
TO THE PHONE AND SAID, "OK LORD I'M BACK, WHATS UP?" THE LORD SAID, "WELL,
I'D LIKE TO TALK TO YOU ABOUT A PROBLEM UP HERE." ONCE AGAIN, THE DEVIL
EXCUSED HIMSELF. THIS TIME HE WAS GONE FOR FIFTEEN MINUTES. FINALLY, THE
DEVIL CAME BACK TO THE PHONE AND SAI D, "LORD I'M REALLY SORRY, BUT
I CAN'T TALK TO YOU RIGHT NOW... I'M CATCHING HELL DOWN HERE. THESE DAMN
BAHAMIANS DOWN HERE JUST PISSED ON THE FIRE AND PUT IT OUT!!!"